I've never really been into the Halloween thing. Even when I was a kid, when it was supposed to matter, I didn't care much for it. I think I might have dressed up twice and felt so stupid each time, I just hid the best I could behind an adult.

Having left childhood far behind and not having any kids, my only exposure to Halloween is walking the streets of Madisonville on the holiday and taking pictures of colorfully dressed people (for work!).

Out of curiosity, I looked around the Internet (it's like a big store in there!) to see what the most popular costumes for adults are this year. Mainly because I see lots of costumed adults on the streets of Madisonville every year, and also because it's never a bright idea for a grown man to look up pictures of kids on the Internet.

I found several websites and most of it was what I expected, especially with it being an election year, but the most interesting list was from a CBS affiliate website in Philadelphia. It was a combination of the obvious and a bunch of head scratchers. I now offer the list with my own snarky comments following each one. Your mileage may vary, or YMMV as the Internet savvy say.

Tan Mom

This was the woman who spent so much time in the tanning bed she looked like a well-roasted peanut. Other women called her fake and phony as they applied their makeup in the morning.

Honey Boo Boo Child

Some TV show I keep hearing mentioned, but have never seen. I'm guessing it's a cute kid, 3-5, with a demonic yet somehow charming personality.

The cast of "Girls"

I have no idea what this is. TV show? Movie?

Jessie J

I know this one. British singer who should've had the summer smash of 2011 with a song called "Pricetag," but somehow never caught on. I'm guessing this is from the closing ceremonies from the Summer Olympics where she wore a flesh colored outfit that I thought would cause a bigger stir than it did. I never heard anything about it.

Black Widow from "The Avengers"

If there is anybody around here who can bring to mind Scarlett Johanssen in tight black leather, please bring her along.

S#%%*t Girls Say

Is this a thing? Did I miss something? How is it a costume?

Carly Rae Jepson

Canadian singer who became irritating with "Call Me Maybe" this past summer. Dressing like an average looking 25 year old is a costume?

Kim Kardashian & Kanye West

If there's anybody out there who can look like Kim Kardashian.... from a certain angle, please show yourself.

Gabby Douglas

Not sure who this is. Olympian?

Michelle & Barack Obama

It's an election year, though sitting presidents and their wives are usually big sellers every year.

Big Ang

Once again, no clue.

Snooki & Baby

Reality TV star who managed to make people think getting pregnant was somehow unique to her.

Katniss/Hunger Games

One of the few that actually makes sense.

Pinterest

*confused shrug*

Kate Middleton & Prince William

America's continuing obsession with plain looking rich British people.

Ann & Mitt Romney

Election year. If things don't go their way in a week or so, they'll never be thought of again.

Miley Cyrus' New Haircut

Stupid, but I did laugh.

Lana Del Ray

Singer. I think.

Katie Holmes & Suri

Why?

Anne Hathaway as Catwoman

Another one of the few that actually makes sense.

Jennifer Aniston & Justin Theroux

Actress and guy she's dating? Married to?

Katy Perry "Part of Me" Movie Reel Costume

I can only guess. An actual movie reel?

Zou Bisou

Your guess is as good as mine.

Fifty Shades of Grey

A flowery, badly written book that women think is dirty.

That's just a handful. What are you going as? I'll be the tired, beaten down looking reporter who tries to act excited over something he's seen 20 years running. It's a very elaborate look.

michael.thomason@advocateanddemocrat.com | 442-4575